So who’s got some Christmas cash burning a whole in their pockets? If so, get a wallet and put your cash in it. You don’t want those bills and coins falling on the ground behind you creating a bread crumb trail of poverty. You will need that money to both “make it rain-I-make it rain” and buy a trendy fun gift for yourself. Not everyone hit it big time this Christmas. So we are gonna start this mini-series off with some affordable gifts (for yourself).

Stare at My Chest

The shortest day of the year is behind us (Dec. 21st), and that means it can only get warmer from here. Warm weather brings straight up nudity all day long. But to keep with a culture that doesn’t accept fat naked bodies everywhere I bring to your attention Threadless.com. Check out their slogan: they understand the need for clothing…especially a t-shirt.

Threadless is a community-based tee shirt company with an ongoing, open call for design submissions… If your design is chosen for print, get paid up to $2,500 + $500 per reprint.

Basically, designers submit shirt ideas and if they are chosen by the community, they get printed for anyone to buy. Tons of people can be running around wearing your shirt that gives away the ending to many major films or your shirt which shows giraffes are always better than horses in a race (the 2 shirts I own). Designers can have fun and feel proud that people like their ideas enough to buy them.

If You Do Not Submit, A Shirt Will Still Fit

The best thing about this site is that anyone can buy a shirt. You do not have to be a designer to enjoy a funny or unique shirt. The shirts come in several sizes for both men and women, and some shirts will even come in different colors. The shirts will price anywhere from $5 to about $20.

Choose your great new shirt, or your great new shirt gift for a pal or loved one, and choose it quick! Popular shirts will run out of stock: especially popular sizes like larges for men and smalls for women.

After you get a shirt the site encourages its customers to take pictures of themselves in the shirt to display to the whole Threadless community. This can be just for fun or to help others, who look like you, judge if the shirt will look right on them, as well.

And though they have great visual shirts, glow in the dark shirts, UV shirts, catchy lines shirts, and every other type of shirts, you can also just buy some neat art prints, too. Some of the popular designed shirts have prints of the art you can buy separately and just hang on your wall. Some art should only be appreciated by you, your guests, and your sofas.

So head on over to Threadless.com and find your inexpensive conversation starter today!

…or just check out some of the shirt models…some are hot!

Times the word “shirt(s)” was used in this blog: 26.

I know. I know. Not only did I miss a “Friday Favorites” posting, but I have not added a new post in a week. Lagzors! No excuses but… well, Santa is coming and… ah heck! Here we go!

Women and Children First

There’s no big uproar. No out cry. There will be no hate or animosity either. When LeBron James leaves Cleveland, the fans and city will move on as soon as he signs with New York. King James will be just another character in what is the tragedy of Cleveland, Ohio. Well, not exactly.

LeBron is a local. He grew up in Ohio, and not the racist Cincinnati area (Timothy Thomas). Most Clevelanders, or locals to Cleveland, grow up watching the Indians, Browns, and Cavaliers hoping and praying for a victory. A win. A championship. We grow up watching clips of “The Fumble”, “The Drive”, Willie Mays’  “The Catch”, Jose Mesa’s blown save, and Michael Jordan with “The Shot” over Craig Elho. We continue to lose, yet we still dream for a victory just the same. We may be kicked around, but we are loyal and we never waiver. We know our inevitable fate but continue the Cleveland love anyway. Most of us anyway.

Will the local kid make good?

James has openly admitted to liking the Yankees and Cowboys. Conveniently, these are the teams who were winning when LeBron was young. James not only admits liking those teams but he even wore a Yankee hat to Cleveland’s opening playoff game in Cleveland against the Yankees.

When I think of what LeBron James represents to Cleveland I think of the film Titanic. In the film the ship is going down. Titanic has way more people on board than there are lifeboats. Thus, we hear the crew yell out “women and children first”. There is honor in allowing the (at the time) weaker to get away to safety. The ship is sinking and this brings no pleasure for sure (dieing is usually not desirable), but it is our ship and we are all our own lesser captains. And so, like the Titanic captain, we go down with our ship: the S.S.Cleveland.

James is weak. Physically he may be strong, but mentally he is the rich guy who jumps on the life boat when the officer is looking away. James wins games for Cleveland currently, and that’s great.  But if he decides to go after another treasure other than the heart shaped necklace at the bottom of the sea next to his ship, than he will cement himself as the biggest front-runner in history.

Well, it’s Monday again. Hopefully everyone is stressing out over the holidays coming up. Thinking that they are running out of time to find that perfect gift, let alone any gift. I would keep your eyes on GGG posts for the next couple of days. If you are lucky I will present some great ideas that may or may not include pineapples. So what’s got me steaming this Monday morning?

Chevron Parades for the Holidays

This past Sunday the city of El Segundo had a Christmas parade. Yeah, they don’t call it a Holiday parade. They are mostly conservatives and that means they don’t give a fuck about other religions. Marching baby Jesus, dancing 3 wise men, and Bill O’Riely dressed as Santa in a fire truck, at the very end. Despite the wackiness of it, I have no problem with it. My problem is that they decided to shut down the Main Street (actual name of street, plus it is the main street) in El Segundo. This meant I could only get to the other half of El Segundo (by car) by going way out of my way!

Being a Sunday, I thought I would see if my good pal on the other side of town wanted to watch some football or go holiday shopping. I’m totally gay. I know. I couldn’t call him because my phone’s battery had died the previous night after some long conversations. Normally that would be fine because I would just drive over in 2 minutes and see what he was up to. But on this festive street hogging Sunday the trip would take about 15mins.

I drove way around to literally one street that was going to the other side. There of course was traffic because it was the only way through. Not to mention (though I am mentioning it next…what dumb phrase…anyway) there were cars parked on every little side street because of the parade. One car could pass down the street at a time. I ended up having to wait for cars in the other direction to make their way through narrow sections. After they passed I bombed down the street myself before another car could come and meet me going the opposite direction.

Of course when I got to my buddy’s place he wasn’t even home. I had to drive all the way back around to get back to my side of El Segundo and the world. Round trip estimated time…40mins. No joke! I of course am factoring in the fact that I stopped for gas 3 times. Check out the map below. Main St. was blocked all the way to El Segundo Blvd.

Because of that parade I was short on gas, then cash, and now patience for any parade again. Unless of course it is a parade for a Cleveland sports team when they win their first Championship in over 45 years. And the likely hood of that happening…is thinner than my patience for parades.

There are many times in relationships when it is standard practice to get your lover a gift. There are days when we give that special someone a gift because it is the set aside day for doing so. Valentine’s day is a great example. Be romantic, thoughtful, and giving on this specific day simply because it is tradition. Other days like this include birthdays, Christmas, anniversaries, and of course Memorial day.

These days may be set aside as gift giving times and days to make your tag team partner feel special, but they are not the only days to do good by them. Gentlemen, more often we should make our girlfriends or wives feel special by doing something unique for them, or getting them something to keep upside down frowns in place. She is our everything, yet we do nothing. I submit my top 3 ways to say:

You are special and I love you.

1. A Pineapple

Pineapples are legit! Don’t hate just yet on this exotic fruit turned Spongebob home. A pineapple is a great gift for women. It is affordable, makes a room smell great and they can eat it when they get a craving for a healthy snack (this blog isn’t for guys with fat girlfriends). Plus, when you get a large ripe pineapple, it has a tall plume and looks like a unique lovely flower-like plant. So in a way, you are getting them a flower-like gift, yet still making it trendy and different to make your lady feel special. Feel free to follow this gift up with a ham pizza. Nothing says “I love you” like a do it yourself Hawaiian style pizza.

2. Coloring Books/Mad Libs

When you stop at a gas station nest, run in and pick up some coloring books with cute memorable cartoon characters on it. She’ll forget about your obsession with fantasy football and remember that time the 2 of you sat through an episode of “Blue’s Clues” just to see who would figure out the mystery first. Mad Libs are also good choices. For every noun, adjective, or verb write in a variation of love. Also, while at the gas station, you might as well pick up a his and hers Mickey’s 40oz. Chicks dig duel malt liquors.

3. Diamonds

Blow her mind. It isn’t Valentine’s day and you are not proposing, yet you still got her diamonds? They really are beautiful. Matching them up with your beauty is a perfect way to do what’s right for the world. Some may argue that there are African nations where people are killed over diamonds; well personally, I would slaughter all of Africa for one diamond on my lover. Does that make me racist? No. There are white people in South Africa. The main thing is: women love diamonds and continents of people being murdered.

Readers must know that I have loved and lost. Maybe I didn’t do these things often enough or at all, but that doesn’t mean they still shouldn’t be done…especially the murdering of Africans. These ideas work. Please use them…because I may not get the opportunity to use them myself.

This blog is dedicated to my love. I’m sorry and I love you.

Once again we meet on the last day of the work week. Ah yes, the weekend nears, fun plans get finalized, and the murdered bodies in your trunk from Monday begin to rot. This Friday is a special one! It’s the 12/12: a perfect Friday! We aren’t stuck with a 9/12 Friday like this past September. Nope. A 75% Friday wouldn’t do for us. We demand perfection! Speaking of which…

PB in CCs

Peanut butter in chocolate cups may be the greatest candy ever made. In the time line of great candies, peanut butter cups is right after the stone. The time line is actually just a segment. Nothing. Stone. Peanut butter cup. Nothing better. Hard candy had it’s time, but those everlasting jawbreakers are a thing of the past.

On a side note…

Hard candy relics can still be found to this day. Whether one looks on the ground or on coffee tables in old folk’s crystal bowls, they are everywhere: Ditched in dirt and cradled in crystal.

There may be no wrong way to eat them, but there certainly are right ways to eat them. Personally I like to eat all of the chocolate out siding of the Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup. I place the lump of dried out peanut butter in my mouth and consume the whole piece of peanut buttery magic at once. Why part the innards? May the cups be consumed as they were made: in layers. May they be eaten as Alaskans dress: in layers. And may peanut butter cups be enjoyed as they were originally: next to 2 gunned down car-crash victims.

Today I purchased Fables Covers, a collection of covers by artist James Jean. It has every “Fables” cover from issues 1 to 75. Plus, it includes covers of TPBs (trade paper backs), special stand alone issues, and several sketches and preliminary covers. All of the art in this book is simply amazing.

As a reader of the critically acclaimed series “Fables,” I own several individual comics and TPBs in the series. While “Fables Covers” does show you a smaller picture of how each comic actually was printed, text and all, the book also provides slightly larger final portraits of Jean’s covers. Though all of the final shots are beautiful, the actual comic covers are slightly superior in quality. When in the actual comic size printing, Jean’s art appears more defined and crisp. It is almost like a digital picture that was blown up just slightly too large, and the resolution is not quite good enough. I must stress this is a very minor flaw I noticed only after viewing the complete book. Readers without the individual comics will not even notice.

With that said, the bonuses in “Fables Covers” are exactly what a fan of James Jean’s art could hope for. The beginning sketches and alternative cover ideas takes one behind the scenes and into the mind of Jean as he places the whole interior story on a single page cover (2 page wrap around covers on the TPBs). An excerpt of each issue is included with each cover to help add context, and each work of art is accompanied by a caption describing how and with what the cover was created (example: Oil and Ballpoint Pen on Wood Panel, 18 x 24″. Fables #1).

Bill Willingham, “Fables” writer, also writes a short praising passage for his collaborator. The passage follows a short interview Jean gives Willingham. Besides some written entries by Jean that about sums-up “Fables Covers”.

Jean uses several different artistic styles to create his covers: pencil sketching, acrylics, oil, digital, watercolor, pigment ink, graphite, charcoal and so on. His style of anything and everything to tell the story in a captured scene stands him out as a leading artist in not just the comic industry, but the art industry as well.

Jean has done work for Prada, Nike, ESPN, Rolling Stone Magazine and many other major companies. His career started taking off as soon as he graduated New York City’s School of Visual Arts in 2001.

James Jean has created some of the most memorable and gorgeous covers over the past 7 years. “Fables Covers” captures his talent and is a must own for any comic, fantasy, or art lover.