Holding the door is complicated. There are moments of interaction with our surrounding, and others in the surroundings, that I would rather do without. Holding a door for someone is one of those moments.

The Problems:

• Some people are just rude. If one opens a door going forward the following person should take the batton. The follower should give thanks and take the wait of the door. Unfortunately, too many people do not say thanks, and worse, some don’t even receive the door. Rude people will just walk through with heads down. I hate that.
• The waiting game. Once in awhile you hold a door for someone who takes their sweet-ass time. If eye contact is established you better move on through quickly.
• The waiting game: overtime. Sometimes there is a person behind you at an odd distance. If you hold the door the previous situation may occur, and if you just let the door shut the door shuts just as they get to it and you look like a dick.
• Too close for comfort. Occasionally you are stuck holding the door open ahead of you and the walker-through has to squeeze by you because they are a heavy set person. I’ll allow very few bellies to touch mine, and I would like to keep it that way.

Self-propelled Solution

Every office building needs a rotating door. These are great for buildings with people blind spots. You never have to wait on people or be left in an awkward position deciding to hold a door or not. Occasionally one gets stuck with some idiot who gets in the same little nook with you (making for both of you to create short shuffle steps to push the door forward and not touch), but for the most part rotating doors clear up many door waiting dilemmas.

A trip to the grocery store has its obstacles. Finding a spot, shopping cart or Mini Coop free, can be tough when you are arriving, but the leaving of the store can be tough, as well.

When you enter a grocery store there is often a solicitor. It’s either a group of girl scouts, during the holidays a Santa or charity rep, or just a standard bum. On the way in they just say hello and give you a smile. A regular to the store knows they don’t care about you. All they want is your money. To get it they try setting you up with some connection. Like a sales person in any other field they try to lower your guard early to eventually get what they want in the end: your money.

On the way out of the store you are left with that awkward interaction where you try and avoid eye contact, but they still address you. Often we respond with a mumble or a “sorry.” I have decided to compile a list of ways to deal with this awkward avoidance, so that we are prepared to deal with these scavenging solicitors.

• Actually give them your change.
• Say “sorry” and move along.
• Act like you are on a very intense cellphone call. “No! Tell them to cut the blue wire or we’re all dead!”
• Sneaking out behind someone else. Try hiding behind someone who looks like a giver: a happy old lady works well, but remember…old people are slow try to time your escape accordingly.
• Leave the cart in the store and carry all of your bags. This can be tough, and should be. With both hands full, and your body in a quick shuffle to hurry to the car so you can release the bags, the solicitor will often disregard addressing you. You have no hands to fish-out change and look too busy to bother.
• Bring a gun and shoot the solicitor on the way out.

Whatever you do to get out of the awkward situation, I hope it works. If there is one thing that’s true in this universe, it’s that helping other people can be freak’n annoying.

While watching ESPN’s 30 for 30 Film “The U”, I was messing around with paint on my computer. My first attempt of Spider-Man was done with the spray can tool, line making tool, and some pencil touch-ups. It turned out horribly…horribly awesome!

After the extreme success I obviously achieved with my Spider-Man paint, I decided to try something a little easier. I basically made a red fist with the text “FIGHT!” over it. I have to say, I’m feeling pretty good about my computer paint skills right about now.

I finally contacted Google and got my site cleared of whatever it was that my site was attacked with. I have a new template, and this new post. I will be working on this site to get a sweet new banner and many new adventures, observations, and rants.

Currently my thoughts and writings can be found on gggazzuolo.blogspot.com. For current posts I recommend going there.

I hope you will check back in soon and leave a comment or two on whatever I have running in the future.